Tuesday, February 26 8:08pm
“it will be hot for him under the sun, yet he can’t go naked because of his alopecia” Lisa on giggy. And this is why I love her
Her fucking pomeranian has selective alopecia
Tuesday, February 26 8:11pm
They’re going to visit her stepson, who is now married to her friend, in San tropez. Context only improves it lol
Wednesday, February 27 6:01pm
You should ask him how getting his books published is going. “Couldn’t you at least get an ebook deal? No? Oof...”
Saturday, March 2 11:27am
My mother has lost what remained of her mind.
|“No wire hangers, ever!”|
Monday, March 4 6:36pm
Just saw a bumper sticker that says stop abortion now with the stop in a circle with a line through it. I can’t decide if I want to key it or not. You win this round, person with strong, but indeterminate abortion feelings!
Monday, March 4 6:37pm
On second thought, only the anti choicers would have such a stupid fucking bumper sticker.
Thursday, March 7 8:38pm
Also, is it ok that I’m plotting a bedroom with a fuckload of bookshelves but none directly over my head because I’m certain that my vigorous future love life will inevitably tumble them onto my head and I don’t want to be concussed by Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows?
Saturday, March 9 10:31am
“expectations are premeditated disappointments” maybe that should have been our tag line
Saturday, March 9 11:09am
I mean this is supposed to be our for real last house so I can do whatever I want. Maybe staple Ivy to the walls and call it Secret Garden
|Maybe skipping the rope swing of death. And the ghosts. And the cholera.|
Sunday, March 10 2:39pm
Ahaha my mother HATES my room idea. That’s how I know it’s great
Sunday, March 10 6:21pm
Yup haha. Girlfriend, go visit the gym you fucking “own”!
Monday, March 11 6:31pm
Yeah I feel you. I’m resisting the seductive powers of crazy bread, it’s a challenge
Tuesday, March 12 9:06pm
Paul. Paul. Watching the dance moms explain don’t ask don’t tell, glorious
|Bring ‘em back down to earth, Holly.|
Wednesday, March 13 8:31pm
I need a catchy phrase for when reality television stars give a medical lecture as if they’re qualified to explain it
Wednesday, March 13 9:28pm
Now Kimmy is pretending to be an expert on private investigating. Realllly need a snappy phrase for this. celecturing? Celebrity lecturing? Ughh I need seamless blending. Like celebutante.
Thursday, March 14 10:15am
Also, Frazzled Feminist today: “sometimes I really loathe my job”
Thursday, March 14 12:04pm
Here’s to hoping I never reach a weight where people getting between me and my lunch hour is a joke rather than a reflection on their lack of consideration
Thursday, March 14 1:11pm
The number of times I have used my sneezes as a form of vengeful chemical warfare is frankly kind of disturbing
|Also: saliva and pink eye discharge.|
Thursday, March 14 1:26pm
Yes. I picture some evil person in another department tracking our internet movements and just blocking things as we go to them. Or Grouchy Co-worker specifically requested it.
Thursday, March 14 8:37pm
Icy hot packaging says I can wear one for up to 8 hours and no more than 3 times a day. I could be wearing it every waking hour and then some! Can I do my whole back like a mummy?
Thursday, March 14 8:54pm
But it ALL HURTS. What if I ask That Guy to apply them?
Thursday, March 14 8:56pm
Haha then the mummy back is ok?
Thursday, March 14 8:57pm
Or I could ask him to remove the one I just can’t quite reach...